These three phrases, taken together, constitute one of the most powerful pieces of advice in the whole Bible.

The Bible has many things to say about ideas, theologies, abstractions like faith, belief.

The Bible has many stories to tell. Parables. Anecdotes.

As for straight, practical advice … this is among the most significant and far reaching.

It addresses all relationships – families, siblings, close friends, between siblings.

It addresses all communities – whether church, places of work, social gatherings.

I believe it has something to say to national presidents and world leaders.

If we would make less finger-pointing accusations and listen more, with respect and openness, we’d come much closer to defusing the many explosive corners of our earth.

This formula is the difference between being open-minded and closed-minded.

"Be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger."

        Tradition refers to the book of James as one of the "catholic" letter.

"Catholic," not referring to a church or denomination, but to the idea of having a universal appeal, which is what the word "catholic" originally meant.

Unlike Paul’s letters that address a specific audience, James lacks such an address, which makes his letter sound as if it addresses all audiences.

Four people in the New Testament, acquainted with Jesus, went by the name of "James."

One of them was the brother of Jesus.

Church tradition claims that this was the author of the book of James.

Scholarship is not so sure. We don’t know who actually wrote it.

But it’s a nice thought … someone that close to Jesus focused on practicalities.

The letter was written with a tone of authority, which leads scholars to believe that the author was a respected leader in the early church.

The letter is intensely practical, making an effort to teach people how to be "doers" of the word, and not "hearers" only.

The letter deals with everyday things, like little deeds of kindness, and the words we speak, and going before our altars in prayer.

It is with this obsession with practicality and a passion for peace in everyday community that James gives us this advice: "Let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger."

        Many months ago, I was in a conversation up at the Pacific School of Religion.

Someone mentioned an old field of study, called TA, or Transactional Analysis.

That was back when Thomas Harris’ book was popular, "I’m OK, You’re OK."

One of the professors commented, "Do you know how much that dates us?" And for sure, it does. That was in the late 60’s, and early 70’s.

Among progressive minister’s, back then, this was our whole definition of grace, "I’m OK, you’re OK."

Feeling "OK," and assuming that about others.

Grace is God’s unconditional, no-strings-attached, acceptance of you and me. It’s nothing we can earn or merit. It’s just a given.

I hadn’t thought about Transactional Analysis in a long while. So I leaned back in my chair and ran my fingers through some fond memories.

Joe South, a singer from Atlanta, had a popular song, back then. It went along with the whole movement, and the mood of the times. I found it on the internet:

"Oh the game’s people play, now."

"Every night and every day, now."

"Never meaning what they say, now."

"Never saying what they mean."

Transactional Analysis was part of a pop-psychology movement that gave us words like Parent, Adult, Child, Life Scripts, Strokes, Discounting. It’s a personality theory based on metaphor.

With these interlocking concepts, Transactional Analysis studied the conversational patterns among people, what they called "transactions."

The more destructive of these patterns, they called: the "Games People Play."

Eric Bernes, the founder of the movement, authored a book by that title.

He attempted to classify Games, and to identify their inner dynamics.

Like once a Game goes past the third transaction, it is nearly impossible to stop.

And that Games are played for "Strokes," or units of attention, so our "spinal cords won’t shrivel up."

And that Games are an effort to "discount" the worth or OKness of another. People settle for negative strokes (cold pricklies) if they can’t get positive strokes (warm fuzzies). Being in relationship is better than feeling ignored or isolated.

And that Games are tied to Life Scripts that revolve around a vicious circle of "persecutor," "victim," "rescuer."

As I recall, there was one Game entitled: "Ain’t it Awful."

This Game occurs when people sit around, complaining about things. "Ain’t it awful about so-and-so" "Ain’t it awful about such and such."

One of the Games People Play was called" "Uproar."

This Game occurs when people get into a ping-pong argument, and it goes back and forth, escalating. People pull out "Dirty Laundry" and throw it at one another.

And, there was one called, the "Yes, but" game.

This occurs when someone comes to you with a problem or some advice. You give them a parcel of your wisdom, and they respond, "Yes, but …" and give you the reasons why it won’t work. That game can go on for hours.

Bottom line of all games, is that people are not really listening to one another.

Each is wrapped up in his or her own agenda, and an effort to "win" their Game.

Too often, people just wait until the other person stops talking, and then go on.

The great secret of life, the key to true intimacy and meaningful relationships, is in learning how to listen. How to genuinely listen.

That’s a skill. And it takes practice. But it is well worth mastering.

To listen, we first must stop talking. A rather obvious but overlooked talent.

Listening is NOT a two way street. During our time of listening, we are genuinely interested in the whole world of another. Our heart reaches out to them.

Our expectations and rules for their conformity relax, and we regard them with unconditional positive acceptance; they are fundamentally OK in just who they are.

That’s not a natural nor easy thing to do. It takes compassion.

        There is a story about the Devil and Jesus walking along.

They see something shiny, on the ground.

"What’s that?" asks the Devil.

Jesus picks it up and examines it.

Again, the Devil asks, "What’s that?"

"This is Truth," Jesus explains.

The Devil smiles. "Give it here, and I’ll organize it for you."

That story has a subtle point.

It is captured in the cliché: "The Devil is in the details."

For people can agree on ideals, principles, values, goals.

Where people get hung up is when they try to live together with these things.

All people have the world organized in their own minds.

According to our personal worldview, we have certain expectations, little rules we expect others to follow. The way things "should go." The way things "ought to be."

When others don’t comply, be begin to build up resentment. Anger.

Indeed, this is what we might call, the "anger principle:"

Our capacity for anger and resentment is directly proportional to the number of rules and expectations we hold for other people.

It isn’t entirely the other person who frustrates us … we bring something to the equation.

If we can get past our own expectations and agendas, what people have to say to us is rich and diverse.

Communication becomes much easier and true communion (common-union), much more likely.

Our lives will be broadened and enriched far beyond what we can possibly imagine.

I remember back in college, in a psychology class, the professor was exploring some of the patterns for raising children.

He went over various scenarios:

If we give children too much affection, "such and such" might happen.

If we give children too little affection, "this or that" might happen.

If we give children too much discipline, "such and such" could develop.

If we give children too little discipline, "this or that" might develop.

One of the students, quite concerned, raised her hand and asked, "What’s a parent to do?" "How is a parent to know what’s too much and what’s too little?"

Almost without hesitation, the professor responded, "The child will let you know."

"If you listen."

Obviously, a child will not tell us, in words.

But if we listen with our eyes, and our own feelings, the message is there.

And this is listening. Listening with our whole being.

"Be quick to listen. Slow to speak. Slow to anger."

        On our vacation, we were with Kevin, Christy’s "significant other."

He’s a construction worker, big, solidly build, and with a sharp mind. Quick. Like a steal trap.

He figures things out. He loves to invent things.

There was a chessboard at our Bread & Breakfast. And we sat down to play a game.

He has the fundamentals down, and he is just now learning strategy.

So I suggested a few things … control the center squares, don’t bring your queen out too early, develop your pieces before you attack, don’t move your knights to the outside, as they say, "a knight on the rim is a knight that’s grim."

He picked it up quickly. And with wide-eyed amazement. He loved the game.

In the bookstore, I found a book on chess, and purchased it for him.

He spent a little time with his nose in that book, and then said to me, "Let’s play."

I knew I was in trouble, just by the tone of his voice. He beat me, solidly.

Kevin is now my role model for what it means to listen.

In chess, there is an interesting axiom.

Always keep your pawns on the opposite color as your active bishop.

And that makes sense.

In Chess, a bishops will always stay on the same color, throughout the game.

It’s like some bishops in real life … they have only one way of looking at things.

If your pawns get on the same color as your active bishop, you will get in your own way.

And that’s what the inability to listen will do for us.

Our words become convoluted and all tangled up.

Our resentment begins to build.

And we will find ourselves, getting in our own way.

So, in the words of James:

"Be quick to listen.

Slow to speak.

Slow to anger."